Two «Friends» were checking out their «Gifts» upon graduating from one of Satan’s Demonational Seminary’s (Cemetery’s?). They counted their money and various other «Gifts.»
Each had received a brand new Leather Bound Bible with their name engraved in gold lettering on the cover!
The First said, «What are you going to do with your new Bible?»
The Second replied, «I›m going to give it a ‹place of Honor› in my house! Maybe display it on the Coffee Table or a prominent place in the library I›m going to build! I really don’t understand it all you know.»
The First said, «Of course you don›t! I›m going to build a beautiful building and put myself and my Bible in the Chief Seat, and keep you convinced you can never understand it! Then I›m going to charge you to read it and explain it to you…»
The Second responded, «Can you really do that? I mean do you think people will really come to your building and actually pay you to read it to them? Oh come on! Our country has put a man on the moon and you›re telling me they can’t read a book authored by ‹The One› who made the Moon and set it in the Sky?»
«Just watch me and look around you,» said the First. «Joseph Smith did it! The Catholics did it…They even have a ‹Holy Father› and thousands of ‹Fathers.› They have so much Money, Power, Prestige, and Honor – That’s what I›m after and this little book will bring it all to me! All I›ve got to do is Lie, look ‹Religious,› give them a ‹Spirit of Fear,› and blind their minds and eyes from seeing, and stop their ears from hearing!»
«Wait a minute! You can’t do all that,» said the Second.
«No I can›t,» replied the First; …Butt,«I can get them to divide Christ up between themselves and each take a part – I can get them to take a new name and to fight amongst themselves! It doesn’t matter; all the worldly power and Money belongs to the Devil anyway…And so will they!!!»
The First was aghast! «Why would you want to do that?»
«Because I›m going to obey My Father just as Jesus obeyed His! He even told them about us. Then we killed him so we could seize on His inheritance!»
«Even so,» the First replied. «Our book says he rose from the dead, or rather, God raised Him from the dead – It does!»
«Yeah, that’s true,» answered the Second, «…Butt, that doesn’t matter; they are more interested in the things of the world, and we›ll keep them that way. They only believe what they can see, and we›ll show them plenty! Plus, they are lazy! They don’t want to study for themselves; that’s one of our strongest selling points – We›ll do it for you – It’s the same promise their Father gave them, Pretty Clever, Huh? Only the results are different …Butt, They don’t know it; because they won’t read it for themselves! Our Father is brilliant – A Beautiful Counterfeit!»
«But what about their future?» the First asked!
«That is the trick,» the Second replied. «They think it’s us. And as long as they believe that, their future is THE SAME AS OURS!!! We don’t have a choice anymore and we will make sure they share our future and Our Father’s!»
«Thank God,» cried the First. «There is one thing I›ve learned from you and I thank you for it! Now get away from me and mine. We will trust in God Our Father, His Son Christ Jesus, and the Elect Angels to keep you away from us! We can read for ourselves – And we will…»